I can't remember my first attempt at applying makeup but I can remember watching my mom getting ready for work in the morning. She would apply some blush to brighten up her cheeks and blot her lips with a tissue after applying her lipstick.
I don't know if this is when I first became interested in trying makeup but I remember sneaking little trips into her bedroom to apply that frosted peachy pink lipstick on.
In the 80s, makeup trends were either minimal or super overdone. There is no other way to describe it. There were bold shadows, thick eyeliners, coloured mascaras, frosty lips and if you wore concealer or foundation, well that is an entirely different story...and not a good one! lol!
What is so wild is that some of these trends are making their way back in 2024, but luckily in a much more modern way. While I am glad to see some of them resurface, I hope others never see the light of day ever again. They were not good then and won't be now.
After decades, and many different trends, of applying makeup, it was only recently that I paused to reflect about the story behind the makeup. The chapters of life can reveal many different versions of yourself.
I have done a lot of reflecting this past year and throughout the process, I've allowed myself the space to explore and go deeper into my thoughts. As I was applying my makeup one day, this reflection staring back at me asked, 'why do you take time to do this everyday?'
It is when I took a step back and wondered if I had been using it as a way to mask the raw me all of these years. It kind of stopped me in my tracks because I had never once thought like this before.
I always believed it was for the love of taking something bland (my face) and creating a more colourful version of me. I was always drawn to the assortment of beauty products down the store aisles, especially the softer colours and the frosted and sparkly finishes.
There are many stories behind the makeup and just like any other story, some are good and some are not so good.
After feeling sick all week with a rotten cold, I wanted to put makeup on because I knew it would instantly make me feel better. And it did. However, in that moment, I definitely looked better than I felt which led me to a new set of thoughts.
It made me wonder if there were other times in my life where on the outside I looked put together but on the inside, I felt a little broken. If you saw me, you would think I had my shit together but if you turned me inside out, you would have seen a different version.
In hindsight, the 'made-up' version maybe did actually help to keep me strong and push through in that moment which is not a bad thing. It can make you feel like you are at least trying and not giving up.
You know that saying 'dress the part!' I do feel that with makeup, this same theory can apply. You can see someone who looks like they have it all going on. You may even feel envious just how well they carry themselves.
What no one may ever suspect is that the same person could also be facing challenges they are desperately trying to mask from the world. They may be carrying shame, struggling through personal issues, or feeling like an imposter.
It is hard to be vulnerable in a society that is quick to be an armchair critic. There is a lack of compassion for those who don't fit inside this stereotypical box of a one size fits all approach to life. We expect everyone to be wired the same but in reality, we know better.
I long to live in a world that is accepting of differences. Rather than shame people for not performing to your expectations, we embrace them for being human and doing the best they can do in that moment.
A place where we recognize that you are not broken but you may just need a different set of supports to be your best self from the inside out. A round peg is never going to fit in a square hole so why do we continue to try? And sometimes, life is just hard and everyone experiences hard times so be kind or say nothing at all.
The truth is, I would be fine without makeup and likely save myself a lot of money too! It would save me time, money and effort. For you natural gals out there, you have a good thing going on. I admire that about you. But for me, it's more than just makeup.
It is my happy place. It allows me the freedom to be creative. It doesn't necessarily bring me confidence but it can enhance my confidence. It can lift me up especially when I need an injected boost of self love. It brings me joy when I take the time to treat myself with some kindness. It's taking time out for me, to look after me.
It's like putting in the time and effort to take care of a garden so it can grow. I nurture my skin and tend to my face so I can enhance some of its features. But mostly, it allows me to feel better about facing my day no matter what it throws at me.
There will always be days when it does not reflect the inside picture of what is really going on, but that is okay. Life can be unfair at times and no one gets to escape those days. If adding some exterior glam to the face helps boost my spirits through a difficult time, it might be a blessing in disguise.
I would not recommend this as an everyday, year-round approach as it will not help a more serious underlying condition. This just may be one piece of a larger plan to help you show up for yourself like you do by exercising, journaling, meditating, spending time with loved ones and resting.
Over the years, I have become more aware about my own personal development and growth. The inside needs attention too. You can do all the work on the outside, but if the internal piece isn't tended to, you may be missing an essential part of the equation in your overall wellness.
What it all boils down to is that you should do whatever brings you the most happiness and peace. Don't compare yourself to others or you will never see your full potential. Do what makes you feel good on the inside and it will reflect on the outside.
The point I am trying to make is that we can never truly see a person just by looking at them. While the outside may appear to be thriving, the inside could be suffering. They could be hiding the fact that they are barely holding it together. Your kindness and acceptance could make all the difference in their day.
Let's try not to pass judgment or assume someone's appearance matches who they are on the inside. Let's not expect them to be like us. It's okay that we are not all alike. That's what makes us unique.
Let them be.
You be you.
Stay kind.
Hold space.
Everyone comes with their own stuff and it is not always neatly packaged.
We are all different but our love for one another stems from the same place - our hearts.
Keep showing up for yourself - whatever that looks like.
And sometimes, you do have to play the part - to feel the part - or at least to finish the scene!
Tomorrow is always a new day with a fresh start.
Believe.
Jules xo
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